The way you think and feel about yourself, including your beliefs and expectations about what is possible for you, determines everything that happens to you. When you change the quality of your thinking, you change the quality of your life, sometimes instantly.
You have complete control over only one thing in the universe — your thinking! You can decide what you are going to think in any given situation. Your thoughts and feelings determine your actions and determine the results you get. It all starts with your thoughts – and I have found that inspirational words are a quick way to retune your thinking.
1) “The way get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” -Walt Disney
2) “The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” -Winston Churchill
3) “Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today.” -Will Rogers
4) “You learn more from failure than from success. Don’t let it stop you. Failure builds character.”- Unknown
5) “It’s not whether you get knocked down, it’s whether you get up.”- Vince Lombardi
6) “If you are working on something that you really care about, you don’t have to be pushed. The vision pulls you.”- Steve Jobs
7) “People who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”- Rob Siltanen
8) “Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough.”- Og Mandino
9) “Entrepreneurs are great at dealing with uncertainty and also very good at minimizing risk. That’s the classic entrepreneur.”- Mohnish Pabrai
10) “We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated.”- Maya Angelou
11) “Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Wishing is not enough; we must do.”- Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
12) “Imagine your life is perfect in every respect; what would it look like?”- Brian Tracy
13) “We generate fears while we sit. We overcome them by action.”- Dr. Henry Link
14) “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”- Henry Ford
15) “Security is mostly a superstition. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.”- Helen Keller
16) “The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others.”- Hasidic Proverb
17) “The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.”- Franklin D. Roosevelt
18) “Creativity is intelligence having fun.”- Albert Einstein
19) “What you lack in talent can be made up with desire, hustle and giving 110% all the time.”- Don Zimmer
20) “Do what you can with all you have, wherever you are.”- Theodore Roosevelt
21) “Develop an ‘Attitude of Gratitude’. Say thank you to everyone you meet for everything they do for you.”- Brian Tracy
22) “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”- C.S. Lewis
23) “To see what is right and not do it is a lack of courage.”- Confucious
24) “Reading is to the mind, as exercise is to the body.”- Brian Tracy
25) “Fake it until you make it! Act as if you had all the confidence you require until it becomes your reality.”- Brian Tracy
26) “The future belongs to the competent. Get good, get better, be the best!”- Brian Tracy
Real confidence is “a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.” Fake confidence is pretending to have self-assurance over one’s own abilities or qualities. The key word is “pretending.” When you have to fake confidence you don’t really believe you’re good at what you’re doing or that you possess those personal “qualities.” Following are some ways to differentiate truly confident people from people who fake it:
"Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too" ~ Will Smith
Motivating yourself to start an exercise program and to keep it up can be the hardest part of getting fit. Fortunately, there are 10 ways you can motivate yourself to get off the couch and on the road to fitness. Once you do get into the habit of exercising, you may wonder how you ever enjoyed life without it.
1. Dress the part
Buy some flattering exercise clothes. Put them on first thing in the morning and look in the mirror. You have taken the first step. That was easy! Now, go to the gym and let everyone see how good you look in those workout clothes.
2. Find your favorite fitness routine
Explore as many forms of fitness as you can. Try tennis, swimming, zumba and yoga, whatever looks like fun. Trial and error can help identify which fitness regimen works best for you. Some people prefer to exercise alone while others enjoy the camaraderie of a group. You can decide which you prefer or whether you want to do both. One advantage to group exercise is that you might work out for longer in a class that sets a time limit. Another advantage of group fitness is making friends, which may provide the motivation to show up. Exercise classes can provide a social support network.
3. Exercise when it works best for you
If you’re an early riser, consider exercising before anything distracts you. If you need to unwind after work, evening classes could be just the thing. And if you’re really busy, jumping on that fitness game’s balance board whenever there’s time may work quite well. Experiment with different exercise times and schedules until you find which make it easiest.
4. Make exercise fun
Make exercise fun, advises the President’s Council on Fitness, Sports and Nutrition. Don’t think of exercise as a chore because you might resent it. Listen to music while you run. Look for beautiful scenery to walk alongside. Pick a class or a sport you really enjoy. The fun component will make it enjoyable rather than something you have to do.
5. Buddy up and take advantage of your friends
Studies show that working out with a friend does increase the likelihood that you will stay motivated.
6. Jog your memory as to why you exercise
As important as those reasons are, you may forget all about them when the couch is so comfortable and it’s raining outside. Remind yourself how much better you feel and look after fitness efforts. Focus on your goal. Maybe you want to impress your ex partner or multiply your dating chances?
What exactly are you after? Do you want killer abs? Do you want to look good in that tiny dress? Maybe you want to maintain flexibility so you can play with the grandkids. Maybe you want to get in shape for the vacation of a lifetime. Visualize that success. Keep your eyes on the prize.
7. Don’t compare yourself to others
Yes, that person sitting next to you in yoga can easily twist herself into a pretzel while minutes in the downward dog posture gets you winded, but you still benefit by trying. If you stick with it, you will be more flexible, have more endurance and feel better about yourself. Maybe one day you too will be able to twist yourself into a pretzel or even run a 10K.
8. Reward yourself
You worked hard. You deserve it. After a morning exercise session, treat yourself to brunch with your exercise buddies. Or buy a bouquet of flowers on the way home from exercise class. Once you lose a few inches, it may be time to treat yourself to a new wardrobe.
9. Consider the price of not going out to exercise
When deciding whether to stay couch-bound or head out, remember how you feel after you do exercise. Better, right? Then remember how sluggish you feel when you don’t. Also consider how long it will take you to get back in shape if you miss a few sessions. You really don’t want to go there.
10. Challenge yourself
Challenges keep exercise interesting. You may start out with plenty of enthusiasm but after a while your favorite fitness activity can start to feel like more of the same. A micro challenge makes it a fun game. Try working out with heavier weights or add a few more minutes of walking on the track. Or try another form of exercise. It’s good to mix things up. Social media offers a new way to promote exercise as you can challenge friends to work out.
Getting and staying motivated can be a challenge but once you get fit, fitness could become your favorite new habit.
From personal to corporate, a blog is a must-have when it comes to your online presence. They help create visibility, awareness and a touch point for customers, fans, fellow hobbyists, whoever you chose to address. Blogs can turn into a day-to-day lifelong commitment to prose, or a random visual record of events and achievements. Whatever your blogging style of choice, there are several rules and best practices that everyone should follow.
1. Choose the Best Platform For You
The word blog means so much more than just a stream of text these days, WordPress and Blogger are leading platforms that can help you craft well-designed sites or pages. Pinterest lets you take a photographic lead to your blog, while Periscope is the new way to share your live video, or you can host shows on YouTube and Facebook.
These and many other niche services are all viable. Consider how you can best present yourself, your company or products to the world and go for broke with the most appropriate platform, or play safe and stick with a standard blog you can add many types of media to. Go for an appropriate style and design to attract users
2. Find A Voice For Your Blog
How you address your audience depends on what you want to say and who you wish to appeal to. Personal blogs should reflect your own voice, while a company voice can be narrated by a “persona”, with whoever updates the blog taking on that role. Alternatively, blogs updated by a range of people can have many voices to lend variety and unique perspectives to the mix.
Over time, you will discover what sort of content attracts an audience. Keep mixing that in with new ideas and vibrant images, riveting information and exciting content to keep people coming back for more. Any content that you can provide, either a unique insight or a useful collection of statistics or facts will always be eagerly sought out. Infographics are very popular and easy to create, but don’t go overboard.
3. Get More Insight Into Your Followers
However you track your followers, be it the number of subscribers, clicks or comments, you will want a useful way to be able to contact them. The best way to capture that information is through a contact form. By gathering useful information, even if it is just a name and email address, you can use it to send out regular updates or newsletters. Entice them to sign up, with offers for exclusive content or information and keep in touch as you cultivate a relationship with your followers to find out what they want from you.
4. Build A Reputation
Blogs rarely grow a massive following instantly. Instead, they generally develop slowly until established, and then pick up the pace as more people share news about them, be prepared to put in the hard yards on your blog. No matter how niche, or how small the audience, they will come, as long as you keep at it and provide a genuine voice. Stay true to that tone, and don’t go for gimmicks or pad your blog out with dubious content, users can spot fakes and fakers, and will turn away instantly.
5. Link and Be Linked To
The key to any degree of success is the use of web links. Linking to other blogs and sites will help your ranking. Getting people to link to you, or adding relevant links in forums, discussions and across social media will also help people discover your blog. Paying for links, comments, reviews or followers falls under the faking it category and will be immediately obvious to real followers. There is endless discussion of link types, but don’t let that drive the direction of your blog.
6. Protect Your Blog
Successful blogs are prone to be cloned or have their content being ripped off. Ensure you patrol the web for plagiarists. Also, ensure that your blog text and images are backed up somewhere safe, in case your blog is hacked, the server if corrupted or the host fails. Ensure you only allow trusted contributors access and safeguard passwords and use two-factor authentication to make certain no one else can take control of the site.
One of the biggest mistakes people make when setting goals is to desire things based on their impulses. It’s like a child being distracted by something shiny. Soon enough a shinier thing will come along and before you know it the novelty has worn off. That is why New Year’s resolutions don’t work. You get swept up in the moment. Everyone is drinking champagne and at midnight, when the fireworks are blazing in the night sky, idealistic new beginnings appear on the horizon. Through your bleary eyed haze, all those new goals feel undeniably attainable.Even if you manage to achieve some of those ill planned goals, the satisfaction you anticipated does not fulfill your perceived desire. You wonder if it was worth starting the new health regime, looking for a new career or committing to that course to improve yourself. The recurrent thought that people have is ‘it seemed like a good idea at the time’.
Here are Five things to consider when you are setting goals, to avoid sabotaging your own success.
1. Explore your own needs
Establish goals based on your own desires, not external influences or the need to please others. Ask yourself what you truly want and what will make you happy. Think about your motivation and try different things. Let your own personal experiences inform your decisions and don’t be afraid to push your own boundaries. You should also consider the short, medium and long term impact that a particular goal will have on your life. What are you trying to achieve? Do you want to be healthier, make more money, travel to a place you’ve never been, explore a creative outlet? These aren’t easy questions to answer and deserve your time and attention. Take time to formulate your goals. It’s your life.
2. Consider Authority Bias
Authority Bias refers to the way in which we can be influenced by people we look up to and make their goals our own. Decisions are subconsciously informed by experiences and the authority figures in our lives. It begins at home with parents, extending to peers and teachers in our formative years and then developing further through mentors and experts such as bosses or idols throughout adulthood. Research your desires and goals and broaden your horizons. Ask questions and seek answers from unpredictable sources. You don’t need wealth to live a full and independent life, just a broadened mind. Seize every opportunity and seek out new experiences. Find your individuality and revel in the things that make you unique. You can still find commonality with others and look up to those you admire while still retaining your own distinct qualities.
3. Avoid the Sunk-Cost Fallacy
Often we fall into the trap of thinking that we have wasted previous investment of time and money into a particular goal and so feel obliged to finish what we started. You can change your mind. All learning is valuable and anything you have invested into achieving a goal is worthwhile. It is all part of the process, even if it has shown you that you are on the wrong path. Try to be aware of the bigger picture, while at the same time focusing on the immediate decisions you make and living each moment as it comes. When you aim for happiness and satisfaction as the end result of each goal, the journey you take to get there is just a detail. The end will justify the means.
4. Goals vs strategies
Work out the difference between what you want and how you will get it. CEO of Thought Leadership Leverage, Peter Winick says,
“Strategy is an exercise in problem solving…….Goals that support the strategy are critical, but goals do not solve problems. Goals are a measure of progress. Goals support the strategy.” Strategy Is Not the Same as Goal Setting, Thought Leadership Leverage.
The steps and decisions required to move you forward can be broken down into smaller and more attainable goals; all culminating and contributing to the ultimate goal you have set for yourself, but they are not goals in themselves. Strategies are the choices you make, the tiny bites you take to get you to your destination.
5. Self belief and determination
Setting goals can seem daunting and sometimes we set goals that are so unattainable, just a shiny dangling carrot, that we have already set ourselves up to fail before we’ve even begun. Self sabotage, creating limitations, looking for obstacles and making excuses prevent us from achieving our goals. The flaw is not only in the goal, it taints the strategy. When you set realistic goals and are true to your own desires, the choices you make happen naturally and easily. Having self belief and learning to trust your instinct will ensure you make the right choices to take you closer to achieving your goals. Stop comparing yourself to others and keep your eyes on the prize.
So many things to do, so little time.
In a world where things move at rapid pace and people get impatient waiting for anything longer than 5 seconds, it feels like there are tons of things on our plates.
There’s that urgent email we need to get back to, a project that needs finishing, and of course, time off with friends and family (if there’s even time left).
The more work we have in front of us, the easier it is to get into a frantic state of mind.
I noticed that busy people often work on tasks that they think need to be done, but are actually counterproductive. I’ve managed to pinpoint these habits in my own life and replace them with better habits.
Here are a few things you should stop doing if you want to get more done:
1. Trying to do everything at once
Do you ever see those people who are completely frazzled?
They’re pulling their hair, running from place to place, and barely have time to breathe. It’s like they’re trying to do everything and completely panicking.
I used to think people like this got more done. That is, until I saw their results. I then realized that trying to do everything prevents you from getting really good at anything.
Trying to do everything is an indicator of lack of decisiveness, not ambition. So if you want to become an expert at something, it means saying no to other opportunities – at least for now.
For instance, top ranked tennis player Serena Williams is into fashion and has her own clothing line. But when she first started out, she focused all her energy on becoming the top female tennis player. Her fashion business came later.
Become the best in one area, and then branch out later.
2. Micromanaging everything
Micromanagement is a common problem for perfectionists who need everything to be done their way. They tend to hover over other people’s work, and try doing things that could have been done more easily by someone else.
The worst part about micromanaging is that other people feel smothered and dissatisfied that their work isn’t respected.
Instead of looking over every single detail, try to focus more on the big picture. Loosen the reins to give others some decision-making power (to a certain extent). It’ll be better for your health and well-being.
When you learn to let go of some things, you’ll find that you can accomplish more of your goals.
3. Just winging it
I remember back in school when we had to prepare presentations for the class. There was always someone who would say, “I’m just going to wing it!”
Chances are, that person wasn’t performing at the top of the class. Even if they were, the person wasn’t actually winging it.
High-achieving people are proactive, rather than reactive. They prepare relentlessly and practice daily so that when the time comes, their performance is flawless.
I like to get ready for the next day by preparing myself the evening before by using the Page Turner Technique. Doing so keeps me organized and calm, even when things get hectic.
If you want to excel, don’t wing it. Practice instead.
4. Not giving yourself any free time
A common misconception is that successful people work day and night non-stop. They don’t have time for fun or games.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
Creative people and innovators often need spare time in order to explore. By taking time to relax, they can reflect on obstacles they face and see them from a different perspective.
Arianna Huffington herself said that sleep is the secret to success. So often, we think that not having any time to rest is a badge of honor that we wear proudly. Instead, we should think about getting more sleep to re-energize, become happier, and get more done.
If you want to feel refreshed and creative, try taking a break from your work.
5. Skipping lunch
A friend bragged to me the other day that she had worked for 18 hours a day, non-stop. She revealed that she frequently forgets to eat because she’s so busy.
On the other hand, another friend gets lots of sleep and cooks his own food. He has more spare time and energy for hobbies. Guess who burned out eventually?
Skipping meals lowers your energy and concentration levels, so that you get less work done for each hour you put in. It also leads to increased cravings for foods that are quick fixes, like junk food and sweets.
I find that preparing my lunch beforehand helps to set up my day right so that I don’t have to look around for something unhealthy to quickly satisfy my hunger. It also gives me one less thing to worry about.
Why is it that low carbers frequently experience shockingly rapid weight loss at the beginning of their diets, then appear to “plateau”?
Does going on a ketogenic diet mean you have to stay on it forever?
Why do many folks experience a few days of low-energy moodiness (“low carb flu”) at the beginning of ketogenic diets?
The answer to all of these queries can be found in understanding our body’s relationship with glycogen.
Glycogen is the way the body processes and stores glucose as energy, chiefly in the liver and the muscles. High intensity activities like sprinting draw upon the glycogen tucked away in our muscles for fuel, which is why you hear about marathoners “carb-loading” in the days before a big race.
The glycogen stored in the liver is what keeps specific systems running all day, including the brain, kidney cells, and red blood cells. For anyone not low-carbing, the body needs a minimum of 100g of glucose each day in order to meet the basic demands of the brain.
So — what if a person consumes significantly less than 100g of carbohydrates in a day? What happens when the body runs out of glycogen stores?
The hierarchy of energy sources
Your body’s just as lazy as you are on Sunday afternoon eating chips on the couch, and it will get energy from the easiest sources possible as long as they’re available. The zippiest energy comes from carbohydrates in the diet, especially simple carbs quickly converted into sugars (think white bread, sweets, fructose, etc.), with more complex carbs following shortly after.
For a person following SAD (Standard American Diet) — we’re talking easily over 300g carbohydrates a day on average — the body may not ever burn through this ingested potential energy. Instead, it simply sweeps it away under the rug — you know, the one bulging around your waist — where no one will ever notice.
When you cut ingested carbs down to below that 100g/day mark, however, something quite interesting happens. The body burns through those consumed carbs first, then turns to the glycogen stores in the liver to maintain its basic system functions. When those stores run out — usually after about a day of carb deprivation — is where the magic really happens.
Gluconeogenesis: the body’s back-up plan
The body may be a lazy bastard, but it keeps a few tricks up its sleeves. If there’s no more glucose nor glycogen to be had, a process called gluconeogenesis begins in the liver (long one, but break it down: “gluco” = glucose, “neo” = new, “genesis” = to make).
Gluconeogenesis is the reason why you don’t actually need any dietary carbohydrates whatsoever to keep rattling down the street. When faced with low carbohydrate intake in the diet, the liver will kick into gluconeogenesis gear, generating the glucose necessary for brain function from glycerol in lipids and amino acids in proteins.
Hitting the wall: low carb flu and fat burning mode
However, getting your glucose through gluconeogenesis is also is a much longer process, and rather shocking for your lazy punk of a body to switch to all of a sudden. Consider those marathon athletes — the condition known as “hitting the wall,” when total exhaustion just suddenly takes over and no more energy is to be had, is the direct result of glycogen depletion in the muscles.
For non-marathoners, glycogen depletion is generally brought on by switching to a diet low in carbs, and the first few days eating this way often brings on similar feelings of running into a wall. It’s a beast known by many names – the Atkins flu, Induction flu, keto flu, low carb flu — and is marked by 2-3 days of nausea, headache, low-energy, and irritability. The body’s been so used to getting its energy from quick-n-easy carb-cheezies; the low carb flu is the bummer of a side effect as it switches over to other sources of fuel.
What lies on the other side of the flu is excellent news for anyone looking to ditch the jiggle, however — the best alternative energy source for the newly adjusted body is its fat stores. Congratulations: you have now entered fat-burning mode!
Is it really fat? Losing water weight
It’s very common for those new to low-carbing to lose a significant amount of weight very quickly at the beginning of their carb restriction. We could be talking four pounds, or even ten or twelve, depending on how overweight the person is to begin with. Why is this? Isn’t this a dangerously fast rate of weight loss?
It’s all about the glycogen stores — as it turns out, each gram of glycogen is bound to 3-4 hefty grams of water. So, as your body burns its way through the reduced dietary carbs and into the glycogen stores, the water attached to the glycogen flushes away as well — resulting in the phenomenon commonly known as “water weight.” There’s no fat loss here, yet — the glycogen and accompanying water’s simply been squeezed out of your muscles and liver.
This also explains why plenty of folks experience an alarming weight gain in the day just following a cheat meal. Even if the ingested carbs are at a moderate level (i.e. consumption of a grilled cheese sammie, not an entire deep-fried birthday cake), your greedy liver and muscles snatch up as much glucose as they can take, and up to four grams of weighty water accompany each grabbed gram of glycogen. Bam! Instant significant weight gain.
Water weight: easy come, easy go, neither cause for panic nor glee. Truly incinerating the nasty fat requires sticking to a low carb diet for a while, taking advantage of fat burning mode over time.
Will all the fat burned during ketosis return with a vengeance?
One of the most persistent warnings low-carb naysayers have regarding losing weight in a ketogenic state is that “you’ll just gain it all back once you go off the diet.” The horror!
Also, completely untrue. The “water weight” resulting from glycogen stores will return almost immediately as soon as you switch back to ingesting more than 100g/carbs a day — that’s just the nature of glycogen storage. Any weight gain beyond that is as a result of caloric surplus, not anything having to do with coming off ketosis.
The bottom line
Glycogen is a way the body stores glucose as energyUnder 100g/carbs/day will begin to deplete glycogen storesSwitching away from glycogen as your principal energy source causes the “low carb flu”Glycogen binds with water molecules; flushing it away results in loss of “water weight”
Remember when you thought you’d have life all figured out by the age of 30?
But now here you are, officially a 30-something and yet your life is far from sorted. Well, don’t worry, you’re not alone.
For most of us, our 30s are a time of change and uncertainty. Perhaps things haven’t worked out quite how you would have liked so far. But the good news is, there’s still plenty time to shape the life you want and you’re sure to learn a lot along the way.
Here are some of the lessons you’ll learn during your 30s.
1. You’ll learn friendships change
Your friendships will change a lot during your 30s. As people pair up, have kids, move house or change jobs, your friendships inevitably alter.
You may discover friends you have known for years don’t make the effort to keep in touch anymore. Or perhaps you no longer have anything in common with friends you’ve had since childhood.
It’s difficult to accept but there may be people who simply aren’t meant to be in your friendship circle anymore. But new friendships will take their place and the good news is, the friends you have at the end of your 30s will probably be friends for life.
2. You’ll learn to make big decisions
When you enter your 30s, you realize those big decisions you’ve been putting off can’t wait forever.
During my 30s I moved house twice, set up a business and had a baby. All demanded huge decisions that I’d been able to avoid during my 20s.
Decisions about your career, family, finances and relationships – you’ll face them all during your 30s. And no matter how old you get, making decisions is tough but with every big decision, your life changes; usually for the better.
3. You’ll learn about heartache
Divorce, fertility issues, bereavement, these are all things many people in their 30s have to face, often for the first time. The thing is, the journey through life isn’t meant to be straightforward and you can only really appreciate the highs, when you’ve also experienced the lows.
As Winston Churchill said: “If you’re going through hell, keep going”.
4. You’ll learn what’s really important
As you get older, your priorities change. The things that were important to you in your 20s such as making money or owning the latest gadgets will now seem less important.
Your 30s is a time to redefine your priorities; whether that’s traveling more, achieving a better work/life balance, or starting a family.
5. You’ll learn about compromise
Life is full of compromises and during your 30s you may find you have to compromise on big things such as taking a pay cut to get the job you really want, or moving city to be with the person you love.
Of course, it’s equally important to know when not to compromise. If you want kids but your partner doesn’t, it’s probably impossible to find a compromise. Instead, you may have to make the difficult decision to walk away from the relationship to get the life you really want.
6. You’ll learn to look after your body
Alcohol, sugar, late nights; they all take their toll. In your 20s you can enjoy your vices without inflicting too much long-term damage. But in your 30s, all those bad choices suddenly have a huge impact.
When you look in the mirror and see wrinkles, grey hairs and saggy skin for the first time, it’s a shock. And while you can’t reverse the ageing process (at least not without lots of cash and a great cosmetic surgeon), you can slow down the effects of ageing by making smart choices.
Now is the time to nurture your body to keep you healthy throughout your 30s and beyond.
7. You’ll learn to invest in the future
“Live for today” is the mantra of most 20-somethings. And this is perfect when you’ve got plenty time ahead to iron out your mistakes. But as you enter your 30s, you’ll realize although enjoying the moment is still important, you also need to plan for the future.
By investing in your finances, your health and your relationships you’ll form good habits that will make your future healthier and happier.
8. You’ll learn life is short
In your 20s you had the luxury of knowing that your whole life was still ahead of you. Meanwhile in your 30s, the sensation that time is hurtling along just keeps getting stronger.
You’ll treasure every second more and only go for things you really like or really needed.
9. You’ll learn about regret
Did you want to be a millionaire by the time you were 30? Travel the world? Win an Oscar? Goals you had in your 20s may no longer seem achievable and although it’s hard to let go of your dreams, with the wisdom you’ve gained, you can create new ones.
10. You’ll learn about children
Whether you already have kids, want kids, or definitely don’t want kids; there’s no escaping the fact that during your 30s everyone seems to be talking about children.
When you have absolutely no interest in kids, all the conversations about diapers and nurseries can become tiresome. But seeing your friends settle down and have kids can clarify how you feel about starting your own family.
You may find your thoughts about children change when you hit your 30s. Plenty of people (including me) change from thinking “definitely not”, to “definitely maybe” as they realize it’s a decision that can’t be put off forever.
11. You’ll learn to develop your own style
Knowing how to dress in your 30s isn’t easy. You’re too mature to wear teenage fashions but not ready to dress like your parents. Take the opportunity to develop your own style. It’s refreshing not to have to be a slave to fashion anymore.
12. You’ll learn to socialize differently
If your 20s were all about all-night parties and being seen in the hippest clubs; you may learn your tastes change in your 30s. Personally, I’d rather go for coffee than cocktails and much prefer watching a film with friends to hitting the town.
Being in your 30s gives you the freedom to do the things you really want to do, not what you think you should be doing.
13. You’ll learn not to sweat the small stuff
Remember when you were worried about everything? What to wear, how to cut your hair, whether your colleagues thought you were a dork for staying in on Saturday night? Well, great news; in your 30s you’ll learn not to care about the little things.
It’s painful to realize how much time you wasted overthinking things but the worries that caused you sleepless nights in your 20s simply won’t matter anymore. And when you learn not to sweat the small stuff, you’ll have more energy to focus on more important things.
14. You’ll learn to manage your money
If you haven’t already got your finances in check, you’ll learn to during your 30s. No doubt you’ll make some mistakes along the way but you’ll quickly become an expert.
Whether you’re investing in business, property or parenthood; now is the time to focus on money matters and financial planning.
15. You’ll learn to value your family
During our late teens and 20s many people grow apart from their parents and siblings as they fly the nest and embrace freedom. But during our 30s, many rediscover the importance of family.
Having kids of your own can bring you closer to your parents. And as your friendships change, it’s comforting to have the stability of family relationships.
16. You’ll learn to stand up for yourself
Whether it’s asking for a pay rise, or standing up to bullies at work, once you’re in your 30s, you’ll learn how to be assertive when it counts. Confidence comes with age so don’t be afraid to ask for what you want; you just might get it.
17. You’ll learn to love yourself
Your 20s can be a difficult time when you’re constantly comparing yourself to others and worrying “am I good enough?”. Well, the good news is your insecurities lessen during your 30s.
You might not have life completely figured out yet but you’ll definitely care less about what others think and learn to love yourself a whole lot more.
Whether you prefer long runs or weightlifting, a post-workout refuel is crucial for the recovery process. Not only does it help large muscle groups rebuild for the next outing, but the right foods can release more slowly over time for sustained sustenance. Here is a great collection of foods to make sure you are working out out at peak performance.
This sweet superfood has carbohydrates, fiber, and protein — with zero fat. They replenish glycogen in the body, which is essential for helping you maintain output when your body has run out of fuel. Oh, and don’t forget about Vitamin B6, C, D, iron, magnesium, and potassium — all of which help your muscles go the extra mile.
This milk derivative is made from bacteria and provides a dozen grams of protein or more. Studies have shown that high-protein and dairy diets can lead to favorable outcomes when measuring fat loss.
Pita and Hummus
This may not be first thing you think about when it comes to recovery snacks, but maybe it should be. The pita provides slow-release carbs that help your body stay energized long after ingestion, and hummus is loaded with protein in case you favor anabolic workouts.
One word: potassium. This essential electrolyte is important for proper fluid balance and muscle function. Intense workouts will deplete potassium, but one banana provides over 400mg of the nutrient.
This is another example of a common food that does not always seem like a go-to workout snack. But thanks to all their folate, Vitamin A, phosphorous, selenium, and protein, eggs should definitely be on your radar. They are also loaded with choline, an essential ingredient that goes into making healthy brain cells.
Sometimes you can be chastised as an introvert for being a pessimist. Whether you feel it’s a choice or if you simply could never stop being so negative, in some way you may actually like it. Let’s face it we all see that overly happy person at work, serving us food, or taking our order for something, and we think “How can they be so happy?”. So many videos and posts urge us to have this outlook on life. They say we would be much better off being positive and happy. What if we don’t want to? Some people just want to watch the world burn, and nothing will stop us from having such a nihilistic viewpoint, which we prefer. So what are some of the earmarks of liking your own unhappiness?
When the glass is always half empty
For as long as I can remember I have thought of the glass as being half empty. If a glass is presented to you that has a liquid level of exactly half of its volume, what would you say the level of it is? Is it half full, or half empty? Recently I have changed my response to a more realistic one. I just tend to say that there is only half there. But with that new response there is a resistance to change; for ages I had thought of the glass as being half empty. The question of the glass has always been one of optimism versus pessimism. Now that I am older and wiser I know that being negative is not always the best thing, yet my reluctance to even simply say that the glass may be half full is apparent. Now there’s just half a glass. Baby steps.
When you feel stuck, and put conditions on your happiness
There was a point in my life where I had begun to feel positive. I had positive thoughts and emotions, my relationship was going well, and my work life couldn’t have been better. This terrified me! I had never had these feeling before; I’ve never been a happy person, luckily it didn’t continue and my unhappiness reared it’s ugly head once more. I once again stumbled about life trying to find my way and the ultimate goal of my ideal happiness, is that really the life for me?
That’s right, I too aspired to be happy. But there’s a catch– I put so many conditions on my happiness that it became almost unattainable. I’d like to make X amount of money, live in X house, and have the partner that has X qualities. What happens when we are trying to attain these goals? We’re usually stricken with the kind of unhappiness that I’ve felt over the years. And when we do meet these goals for happiness? Well it just so happens that more goals are placed on the pile to achieve before we can become a “happy person”– that way we are always unhappy.
When your personality separates you from others and makes your unhappiness grow
Some people are more comfortable with a solitary life, they would rather stay in and not go out. An introverted person will avoid personal encounters with even the people they are most familiar with. It’s not that they don’t want talk, they just won’t have the sort of open and happy conversation you’re looking for. Introverted people know the daily struggle of being seen as shy or awkward, and when they open up and talk they hear things like “Wow I really brought you out of your shell.”, or they’re told something about how well they speak. It’s wasn’t that they were never a good speaker and couldn’t speak, maybe they just didn’t value the low brow conversations they had heard before? As introverts, we really don’t like small talk.
When you feel the whole world is against you
Some of my relationships are the source of my happiest times. Most of my relationships, however, have been a headache, or ended in heartbreak. The difference between the two is subtle. Some relationships fall together like they were meant to be. They don’t always have to be romantic ones, in fact most of my happiest relationships are with friends of the same sex. My unhappiness in relationships has been the result of failed romantic endeavors. If you’re currently single then all of your romantic endeavors up until this point have failed. With romance, it’s a mutual thing, and you have to look at the cause of the failure; you can’t say that it was entirely their fault. Maybe you will be destined for unhappiness, and if you’re looking for love on Tinder or other dating apps this is likely. The only form of comfort we can hope for is to share our cynical perspective and unhappiness with someone equally as unhappy as we are.
Conclusion: Live for today
I won’t tell you some spiritual nonsense about learning to love yourself. This plight is certainly not due to the fact that one cannot love the inner self that you retreat to when society seems cruel and uncaring. When all your relationships have failed you and even your family and close friends have grown and become distant you will need to find something to hold on to. You can read a book or other helpful articles on Lifehack.org on the same topics.
If you’ve found that the world inside yourself has become grey and dull from the unhappiness you experience find another world to explore. Life can be mundane at best, and wherever you travel humanity has a way of being indistinct in certain cruel or pernicious ways.
But find the love, find it whenever you can and hold on to it. It has a nasty habit of slipping through your fingers sometimes but if you feel you have lost it, just remember there is a whole world out there where you can look for it. It may be in the tiniest of books, or URLs. It could be in the smallest laugh of a child or whimper of a baby animal, and sometimes when you’re looking for too long, it might be right inside yourself that you find the cure for your unhappiness. The help you can give to others, even a stranger, can open up the most trod upon of hearts and emotions. This too, I’m sure you will hate, for it is a thankless act.
Letting go is often quite hard, but there comes a time when we must. That is one of the most important life lessons each one of us must learn. It is only by letting go that we are able to move on with our lives. It is only by letting go that we can forgive and, hopefully, forget.
Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone or something anymore. It just means that you realize that the only thing you truly have control over is yourself. It doesn’t mean you wanted to, it just means that you had to. You had to because letting go is a necessary process of adapting to the ever-changing realities of life.
As is often the case with matters of the heart, you will know deep down within yourself when it’s time let go, when it’s time to turn the page. A quick gut check and sobering words of wisdom from trusted friends or great thinkers can provide all the confirmation you need.
Here are 30 powerful quotes about letting go that will move you. Because sometimes letting go is the only way to move forward.
Would you say that focusing on acquiring something (like new skills) might make you blind to the baggage you’re already carrying? It may be the case that you don’t have any unproductive habits as a speaker. If so, go ahead and keep your eye exclusively on that prize of newly acquired skills. But just in case, peruse the list below of seven bad habits to avoid during conversation.
Highly confident people believe in their ability to achieve. If you don’t believe in yourself, why should anyone else put their faith in you? To walk with swagger and improve your self-confidence, watch out for these fifteen things highly confident people don’t do.
1. They don’t make excuses.
Highly confident people take ownership of their thoughts and actions. They don’t blame the traffic for being tardy at work; they were late. They don’t excuse their short-comings with excuses like “I don’t have the time” or “I’m just not good enough”; they make the time and they keep on improving until they are good enough.
2. They don’t avoid doing the scary thing.
Highly confident people don’t let fear dominate their lives. They know that the things they are afraid of doing are often the very same things that they need to do in order to evolve into the person they are meant to be.
3. They don’t live in a bubble of comfort.
Highly confident people avoid the comfort zone, because they know this is a place where dreams die. They actively pursue a feeling of discomfort, because they know stretching themselves is mandatory for their success.
4. They don’t put things off until next week.
Highly confident people know that a good plan executed today is better than a great plan executed someday. They don’t wait for the “right time” or the “right circumstances”, because they know these reactions are based on a fear of change. They take action here, now, today – because that’s where progress happens.
5. They don’t obsess over the opinions of others.
Highly confident people don’t get caught up in negative feedback. While they do care about the well-being of others and aim to make a positive impact in the world, they don’t get caught up in negative opinions that they can’t do anything about. They know that their true friends will accept them as they are, and they don’t concern themselves with the rest.
6. They don’t judge people.
Highly confident people have no tolerance for unnecessary, self-inflicted drama. They don’t feel the need to insult friends behind their backs, participate in gossip about fellow co-workers or lash out at folks with different opinions. They are so comfortable in who they are that they feel no need to look down on other people.
7. They don’t let lack of resources stop them.
Highly confident people can make use of whatever resources they have, no matter how big or small. They know that all things are possible with creativity and a refusal to quit. They don’t agonize over setbacks, but rather focus on finding a solution.
8. They don’t make comparisons.
Highly confident people know that they are not competing with any other person. They compete with no other individual except the person they were yesterday. They know that every person is living a story so unique that drawing comparisons would be an absurd and simplistic exercise in futility.
9. They don’t find joy in people-pleasing.
Highly confident people have no interest in pleasing every person they meet. They are aware that not all people get along, and that’s just how life works. They focus on the quality of their relationships, instead of the quantity of them.
10. They don’t need constant reassurance.
Highly confident people aren’t in need of hand-holding. They know that life isn’t fair and things won’t always go their way. While they can’t control every event in their life, they focus on their power to react in a positive way that moves them forward.
11. They don’t avoid life’s inconvenient truths.
Highly confident people confront life’s issues at the root before the disease can spread any farther. They know that problems left unaddressed have a way of multiplying as the days, weeks and months go by. They would rather have an uncomfortable conversation with their partner today than sweep an inconvenient truth under the rug, putting trust at risk.
12. They don’t quit because of minor set-backs.
Highly confident people get back up every time they fall down. They know that failure is an unavoidable part of the growth process. They are like a detective, searching for clues that reveal why this approach didn’t work. After modifying their plan, they try again (but better this time).
13. They don’t require anyone’s permission to act.
Highly confident people take action without hesitation. Every day, they remind themselves, “If not me, who?”
14. They don’t limit themselves to a small toolbox.
Highly confident people don’t limit themselves to Plan A. They make use of any and all weapons that are at their disposal, relentlessly testing the effectiveness of every approach, until they identify the strategies that offer the most results for the least cost in time and effort.
15. They don’t blindly accept what they read on the Internet as “truth” without thinking about it.
Highly confident people don’t accept articles on the Internet as truth just because some author “said so”. They look at every how-to article from the lens of their unique perspective. They maintain a healthy skepticism, making use of any material that is relevant to their lives, and forgetting about the rest. While articles like this are a fun and interesting thought-exercise, highly confident people know that they are the only person with the power to decide what “confidence” means.
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